September 11, 2006

Rove’s strategy: remind them Republicans are better at attacking other countries if we ever get hit again like we did on 9/11

Posted in political satire at 6:18 am by thewashingtonbeltsider

by Terri Firma

With major intelligence officials stating that another majr terrorist attack is a matter of “when” and not “if,” administration political advisors see the report as a salve on their 2006 mid-term electoral strategy, helping the party take the races national, as they can argue that they have kept the nation safe in the aftermath of the first attack, and they can keep the nation safe after another one. “It’s sort a ‘Catch-22’ for the Democrats,” Chief White House political strategist told aides, “because they distance themsleves from us on Iraq, and that’s what kept us safe after the first one, and they won’t have the guts to throw in against someone other country later if we get attacked again in the future. See the beauty of it? maybe not a ‘Catch-22,’ though. Maybe more of a ‘good for the goose, good for the gander’ probably. Forget it. We’re just going to win. We always do. Scary stuff. And I’m so good at this stuff, sometimes, it gets scary!”

It is unclear if local campaigns will try to steer clear of this White House strategy, and the White House’s attempts to steer the election to national issues. “Rove is dangerously insane. We don’t take him seriously. At the same time, don’t tell him I anything I said,” said Congresman Peter King’s chief campaign advisor Andy Bean.

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