August 12, 2006

Lamont: “But I don’t really know Osama bin Laden”

Posted in political satire at 9:03 pm by thewashingtonbeltsider

by Tom Toburn

Pressed to respond to Vice President Dick Cheney’s remarks indicating that he would be conferring and caucasing with Osama bin Laden from his Senate office if he were elected, Connecticut Democratic Senate nominee Ned Lamont countered “But I don’t know (really) know Osama bin Laden, so I don’t know how that could be.” Asked if he would focus primarily on the issues of undermining the United States and pursuing a policy of retreat in the campaign against terror, Lamont said, “I think, in the Senate, the job is related more to voting on bills and such.”

He did not respond to accusations by Republican National Committee chairman Ken Mehlman and others insisting that Lamont is French.

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6 Comments »

  1. Thomas Shea said,

    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    We’ve been out of power for so a long time
    We really hope now you will buy our line
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    I seen you fighting IndoChina then
    I wanted too but I lost my pen
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    We sent some money to the welfare line
    You can go and stand there any time
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    The color of your skin don’t matter to us
    Just sit down and make no fuss
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    I really wanna be your President
    So I can show you how your money’s spent
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Sometimes I don’t speak too bright
    Yet I know what I say is yeah right
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    You know were closing down the CIA
    You’ll never recognize the USA
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?
    Why can’t we be French?

  2. Tom Toburn said,

    That’s a nice ditty. Can I use it?

  3. Thomas Shea said,

    Young man, there’s no need to look round
    I said, young man, lift your feet off the ground.
    I said, young man, ’cause you’re in a Liberal town
    There’s no need not to be happy

    Young man, there’s a candidate for you.
    I said, young man, he’s been watching you too
    You can vote him, and I’m sure you will find
    In many ways Ned Lamont’s on your side.

    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.
    It’s fun to vote For the New DNC.

    They have everything for you to enjoy,
    You can hang out with Ned and the boys …

    It’s fun to vote with the New DNC.
    It’s fun to vote with the New DNC

    You can get yourself free, lets make it all real,
    You can do about whatever you feel …

    Young man, are you listening to me?
    I said, young man, this is thee place to be.
    I said, young man, you share in the dream.
    But you got to know just this one thing!

    No man does it all by himself.
    I said, young man, we’ve got money and wealth,
    And its for the New DNC.
    I’m sure we can help in any way.

    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.
    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.

    They have everything for you to enjoy,
    You can hang out with Ned and the boys …

    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.
    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.

    You can get yourself free, you can make it all real,
    You can do about whatever you feel …

    Young man, I was once in your place.
    I said, a liberal is not a disgrace.
    I felt no man cared for my hyde.
    I felt the whole world was such a big bite …

    That’s when Ned Lamont came over to me,
    And said, young man, come stay here for free.
    There’s a place that’s called Greenwich, C T.
    You can sit back and let it be fay.

    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.
    It’s fun to vote for the New DNC.

    They have everything for you to enjoy,
    You can hang out with Ned the boys …

    New DNC … you’ll find it at the New DNC.

    Young man, young man, there’s no need to feel bad.
    Young man, young man, let them all know you are glad.

    New DNC… you’ll find it at the New DNC.

    Young man, young man, there’s no need to feel sad.
    Young man, young man, let them know you are glad .

    New DNC … just vote for the New DNC.

    Young man, young man, your pants are so tight?
    Young man, young man, its so out of sight?

  4. Thomas Shea said,

    This is an parody of Sammy Davis’ Candyman song.

    Who can tell a million lies,
    And blame it on the Jews
    Covers up their women with the burkas that they use
    The Taliban, the Taliban can
    The Taliban can ’cause he’s mixed up with hate
    And wants the world to have his fate

    Who can take some dynamite,
    Wrap it in a vest
    Soak it in some blood and and strap it to his chest
    The Taliban? The Taliban can
    The Taliban can ’cause he’s mixed up with hate
    And wants the world to have his fate

    The Taliban breaks
    Everything he makes
    Satisfying his delusions.
    Talk about his insane wishes.
    You will say he’s evil and vicious

    Who can speak of yesteryear
    As if it were some dream
    Contemplate illusion while he’s in a primal scream
    The Taliban can? The Taliban can, the Taliban can
    The Taliban can ’cause he’s mixed up with hate
    And wants the world to have his fate
    And the world says no
    ’cause the Taliban stinks

  5. Thomas Shea said,

    Yes, you may use any and all of these parodys for any good purpose.

  6. Tom Toburn said,

    You read my mind, son.


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