July 30, 2006

Bush misuses intelligence services again, orders agents to find out if urinating turns swimming pool water purple

Posted in political satire at 10:21 pm by thewashingtonbeltsider

by Terri Firma

Tales of misuse of US intelligence servies by past chief executives are legendary, including Billy Carter’s briefings to locate kegger parties and former President Nixon’s infamous tracking of individuals on his “enemies list.” No abuses seem quite as flagrant as those disclosed by an intelligence source to USA Today, that Bush ordered officers to use all means, legal and otherwise, to find out if swimming pool water really turns purple after swimmers urinate.

“I just want to know,” Bush reportedly told the agent. “Look,” the agent told USA Today, ” I know there’s no chemical in pools that makes the water turn purple after kids piss. It’s an old wives tale. An urban myth. But he’s the President, and I promised I’d find out for sure.”

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