June 12, 2006

Bird flu scare emerges in a suburb of Guam

Posted in parody, political satire, satire, social issues, US News at 6:13 pm by thewashingtonbeltsider

by Tom Toburn

WASHINGTON, DC: After careful planning through much of 2005 and the early part of 2006, the Bush administration feels uniquely suited to handle the challenge brought on by the discovery of a dead bird in East Guam, suspected to have been infected with the Avian flu virus.   Guam is a  US protectorate nation.  The dead bird will be studied later today for evidence of bird flu infestation.

“We have been on the lookout for dead birds all winter,” President Bush said.  “It is because of the precautions, under the leadership of the Secretary Chertoff, and my staff, that we have adequate stores of the vaccine at the ready, and the ability to fight the bird flu epidemic before it emerges to attack millions on our shores.”

Stockpiles of Tamiflu have been available for distribution to up to a 7 million effected individuals and families, in preparation for the epidemic.  The population of Guam is about 154,000, indicating adequate resources for addressing this crisis.


1 Comment »

  1. Doc Zeller said,

    So all those zillions of press conferences the MSM covered on Bush’s bird flu plans are worth it now, right?

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