June 10, 2006

Retired army official discovered who supports Defense Secretary Rumsfeld

Posted in political satire, US News at 11:28 pm by thewashingtonbeltsider

by Tom Toburn

A retired military official who supports Defense Secretary Rumsfeld was discovered yesterday at the Head Trauma Unit at Landers Air Force VA Hospital. Former Chief Rear Admiral Rory Jolden emerged to offer his full support for Rumsfeld in scripted comments to the White House Press Corps. This comes after weeks of blistering attacks by other former top military brass, many of whom were demanding his resignation in the face of perceived micro-managing and mishandling of the Iraq War as well as a condescending managerial style. The White House has been reluctant to respond to such criticism, and was eager to tout the praise of the thrice decorated former Air Force official.

“A brilliant tactitian, by golly,” former Admiral Jolden pointedly remarked. (His head trauma surgeon, Dr. Elliot Spatzer, cautioned that he may have been referring to Naploeon Bonaparte, whom he states his patient often imagines he is beating at chess).

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